Resources

Fifth-grader Ethan moves the reader smoothly through his personal narrative with transition words like first, then, also, so far, and when.

Dylan, a second-grade writer, shares his very personal feelings in an honest, direct way. His first and last sentences tell the whole story; and the middle sentences give the reader important, heartfelt details about Dylan’s experience.

Many details are included in this writing, and a personal tone emerges. The piece has a clear beginning, middle, and ending.

This writing shows the feelings of the writer and is well organized.

This is a fun story with lots of details.

This author brings excitement to her story when she paints a picture of her friend sprawled like a spider.

The writer’s descriptions in this narrative make it a vivid and memorable story.

Kendra, a fourth grader, submitted this model in which she shares a very personal experience.

Elliot, a fifth grader, submitted the model that this narrative is based on. Elliot shares the details of his personal experience in chronological order, just as they happened. He ends his narrative with good feelings about his dog.

This is a very moving narrative about a difficult experience. Sharing what she learned from this friendship makes an effective conclusion.

Charlotte, the seventh-grade writer of this model, organizes her essay into paragraphs that describe different aspects of her subject. The closing leaves the reader with a clear idea of the important place her grandfather holds in her memory.

Tenth-grader Lisa’s voice comes through loud and clear in this model. The use of strong details and dialogue—including the author “talking” to herself—makes this a believable essay about a student’s first high school crush.

The 9th-grade writer of this personal narrative, Emily, uses original word choice to effectively convey a vivid image of the people and environment she encountered on a trip to Africa. The opening paragraphs communicate a sense of excitement that, by the end of the trip, is reduced to disappointment, shock, and guilt.

Lindsey, an adult who uses public speaking in her career, reflects on the childhood experiences that prepared her for success.

Before Facebook, Snapchat, and Pinterest allowed us to gather and store images digitally, students kept their memories in photo albums and even shoeboxes. In this historic model, Alita writes about her shoebox collection of memories. Vivid details recreate the feeling of thumbing through pictures.

Karen, in eleventh grade, shares the details of a Saturday spent working for her family’s business. Her descriptions bring the subject to life, and her ending tells the reader why this work is important to her.

Michelle (grade 11) develops this eyewitness account by answering the “5 W’s and H” about her parents becoming American citizens. The writer also shares her sensory impressions.

Ninth-grader Samantha’s assignment for this essay was to write a series of vignettes, loosely modeled on the novel The House on Mango Street, about her own house, neighborhood, family, and friends.

David deftly interweaves past events that lead up to the football game with the present events of the game itself. The author’s voice comes through loud and clear in the dialogue and in his new-found zeal for football.

Cody, a fourth grader, writes about his wish that his little brother could have known their grandfather.

Fifth-grader Kelli begins this personal narrative with a question that captures the reader’s interest.

This model recounts an embarrassing public experience that provided the writer with new insight into teen pregnancy, single parenthood, and social stigmas. The voice of the piece shows the writer's personality and easily connects with readers. Many vivid details make the experience come to life.

Amy, the author of this personal narrative, effectively uses voice to convey the fear she feels as she ascends a path to an area above a 100-ft. waterfall. Her expert choice of words helps to paint a beautiful picture of her surroundings.

This personal narrative by eighth-grader Alicia presents an engaging voice. Read the essay and notice how Alicia’s personality comes through; she obviously cares about her subject. Her use of details gives the reader a clear picture of the characters and environment in this account of Alicia’s first encounter with racism.