Revising Problem-Solution Essays

After you write a first draft, you'll be ready to start reviewing and revising. When you revise, you think about the "big picture," including the overall structure of your writing (beginning, middle, and ending) and the focus, main ideas, and supporting details you use. These activities will help you revise.

Revising to Choose Strong Support

In your problem-solution essay, strong reasons and supporting details will help you convince readers to care about the problem and agree with your solution. The best reasons and details are specific and tell something important about your subject.

Strong

A service project will make the park safer for play.

Weak

Cleaning will make the park better.

1. ___ Canceling gym class will be bad for kids.
   ___ Canceling gym class will make it harder for kids to stay in shape.   X  Canceling gym class will make it harder for kids to stay in shape.
2. ___ Kids will lose a safe place to play if the rec center closes.
     X  Kids will lose a safe place to play if the rec center closes.
   ___ Kids will lose out if the rec center closes.
3. ___ Reading books introduces you to new people and ideas.
     X  Reading books introduces you to new people and ideas.
   ___ You should learn about new people and ideas.
4. ___ Swimming lessons make your life better and help you a lot.
   ___ Swimming lessons help you stay afloat if you fall into water.   X  Swimming lessons help you stay afloat if you fall into water.
5. ___ The playground equipment is no good.
   ___ The playground equipment is rusty and unsteady.   X  The playground equipment is rusty and unsteady.
6. ___ Learning a second language teaches you about another culture.
     X  Learning a second language teaches you about another culture.
   ___ Learning a second language helps you learn about another language.